Top Ten Annoying Things Dads Can Do

WARNING: Some Fathers might take offense. Please be assured that next week you will be redeemed with the Top Ten Great Things Fathers Can Do. For now, sit back and try not to forget your sense of humor.

1. Dads can go deaf when a child is crying over the monitor at 3 a.m.

2. They can go deaf when a child is whining at 3 p.m.

3. "Forgets" that you have changed million diapers when he hands over a loaded child and says it's your turn.

4. Insist that the kids don't need a sweater when the temperature is 55 degrees because "it will toughen them up".

5. Insist that you are "too easy on the kids." Even though he never actually puts them in time out.

6. He thinks that a handful of pretzel sticks make a perfectly healthy breakfast.

7. Can never do anything other than watch the kids when he's on duty. Your place WILL look like a tornado hit anytime he's with the kids. Will always say that he was too busy watching the kids to do any cleaning.

8. Argues that there is no such thing as watching "too much TV." Which is what your kids will do while dad is "watching them." Not to mention WHAT they are watching (in my house it's Smallville).

9. Never fails to point out a new scratch on the kids that happened during "your watch."

10. He can take 45 minutes getting himself ready before an outing and still manage to forget to pack a diaper and wipes.